
Unruly Confessions
Two best friends host a wild podcast, telling a sexy fictional story of life on tour and beyond with 'The Band'. Please note that this podcast is for over 18s only.
Unruly Confessions
Bonus: Gagreel Ep 10 'Self-Help Kink' Tongue-Twisters, Accents, and Unfiltered Fun!
This is the gagreel for Episode 10 'Self-Help Kink'. It is recommended that you've listened to Episode 10 before listening to the gagreel. You have been warned!
La transcription en français (The French Transcipt) : Dans la description de l'épisode.
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Theme Music: Rat Head - Big Mouse Tree House
Written and performed by: Nicole van Niekerk (Singer), Steve van Niekerk (Lead Guitar & Backing Vocals), Rachel Espeute (Bass & Backing Vocals) & Bertie Atkinson (Drums)
https://music.apple.com/us/album/rat-head/1347222686?i=1347223114
Also available on Spotify and Bandcamp.
Anyway
Arabella :Anyway, He’s not my favourite but Mike is…oh wait no.
Nicole :What ? (Laughs) I was like, that’s confusing.
Arabella :That was not the line.
Nicole :Slappy slap. One such farm was a vineyard with a small family run restaurant. Andrew thought it would be a good idea to stop there for lunch without oh, uh, my Lord, okay, slappy slap. (Both laugh) I was like, I was trying to, I-
Arabella :You did a full me.
Nicole :I wanted to fix it!
Arabella :You did a full me, it was like, I knew something was supposed to be said here, but I don’t know where I am anymore.
Nicole :Exactly, okay. (Hard slap) Ooo, that was too hard, argh, ow my God. (Both crack up) I hurt myself. Okay, I’m going to try again, a soft one. If you don’t mind, Jay, I’d like to show you somethin’ new froooom, why my Lord, wow. (Bella laughs) I shat on it. I’ll go!
Arabella :I’ll go!
Nicole :Bella and Jason offered. That, was not the way Jason would do that. I’ll go! (High-pitched mockery) No.
Arabella :I’ll go! (An even higher-pitched mockery)
Nicole :I’ll go, please let me go! No, can we try, wow, this is hard, can I do it again? (Giggles) Zander, Bella and I briefly explored the binyards…the binyards, oh my God—(Bella laughs) This is not—we’re definitely going to have to do a second take of this shit.
Arabella :Oh my God, so badly. I sighed, looking at Mike…
Nicole :Oh! But you can’t understand.
Arabella :No, I think that must be you, yes that’s you.
Nicole :My gosh, why did we edit this like the backend of our fucking ass? Okay.
Arabella :I know!
Nicole :Okay, let’s take it from your wonderful French line again. (Laughs)
Arabella :The rude one cannot understand that it is a French holiday and therefore the bar is closed, the man told me. (Both laugh) Nicole sighed, looking at *beeped out name* Mike.
Nicole :Wop! Wow. A good *beeped out name* there. (Both laugh)
Arabella :Sorry.
Nicole :Again. I carried, he carried, not, I didn’t carry myself. What, he asked, his voice dripping with the pleasure of authority, so no, not the what I did.
Arabella :No.
Nicole :Not that what. Mr. Solomon, what. Whaaat, I can’t do it.
Arabella :What? No.
Nicole :Mr. Solomon? Don’t the other…(in a southern accent) Don’t I just sound like a southern-ass-bitch and it’s totally me speaking? Can you reach my thigh? Sorry, aw. Now he’s from the conservative government. God help me.
Arabella :(With disgust) Uh. No.
Nicole :He pushed into me, and put his hand on the back of my thigh. ARGH! Okay, is it, can we, can we not? What is going on? (Melo-drama) I got up and pulled his boxers on…(both laugh) No. This is fucking—nothing was going okay. What the—
Arabella :And you made it!
Nicole :--fuck! No, I barely did. Fuck it, man! He moaned. It’s just a phone! (Both laugh) He sounded very British!
Arabella :Fuck it, man!
Nicole :Fuck it, man! It’s just a phone! Hang on. How do I do that? Fuck it, man, no, fuck it. Arabella and Nicole say ‘fuck it, man’ over and over again a million times to find a Californian accent.(Hits her microphone incredibly hard by accident) Oh, fuck, can I just—
Arabella :Wow!
Nicole :I just punched; I just punched my mic in the face! (Both laugh) Come back here and finish this, or I’ll come over there and be fucking northern. (Silly groan chuckle) Sorry, sorry. Billy looked uncomfortable. Okay, that’s enough of that, I don’t want to—Oh, God! (Both laugh dramatically) It sounds so wer, it sounds so weird coming for real, like not having to, you know what I mean, like, not it accidently happening.
Arabella :Oh, oh, oh!
Nicole :Bella realised, wow. (Both laugh) I made you oh, oh for very long. I’m so sorry.
Arabella :It was a very long oh.
Nicole :Okay, yeah.
Arabella :Yeah.
Nicole :Oh, yeah. Sorry. That’s me yeahing, just agreeing.
Arabella :No, that was you trying to take my line!